The consequences of failure.

You know that saying,"Reach for the stars; that way, even if you fail, you would have at least reached the moon."? Something like that. That saying really isn't applicable to a great many situations. Many times, when you fail to reach said stars....you fall from a very great height. The results won't be pretty.

First up would probably be the initial damage to your self-esteem and confidence. You build yourself up quite a bit just so you develop enough balls to go through with this hare-brained endeavour. Upon failing, the house of emotional cards collapses faster than you can say, "Fuck." Then there's probably some kind of residual fallout that may affect others around you. Your failure may reflect on them, actually hurt them in some way, such as when you fail to pull your own weight in a work-related project, delaying the progress of others that depend on your success. Of course, one cannot ignore the reputation damage that may possibly occur, as well as the loss of any time and/or other resources that you pour into the effort. I'm sure there's more, but these are the more apparent consequences of failure.

So, why try to achieve something that is so difficult to attain, comes with great inherent risk, especially if the prize isn't even certain? What if the rewards of success is merely a stepping stone to an even greater challenge? You're not even guaranteed to taste the fruits of your initial labour.

I would try, I think, because a part of me is quite romantic. For all my cynicism, I can still harbour quite a lot of optimism, I can be extremely stoic when need be, I can eventually shrug off all sorts of emotional damage given time without too many scars. Someone told me it's because I was born under the auspices of Gemini. This duality in nature is apparently inherent in such persons.

So yeah. I have hope, and I think I can succeed. I am willing to take chances, after weighing the potential reward against the risks. If I succeed, this could potentially be life-changing. It could be the best decision I've made in my entire life. I have great faith in my abilities, and in what I can do. And even if I fail, heaven forbid, at least I tried. I hate asking myself,"...what if...?"

No regrets. Life is too short for that kind of crap. I'd rather fall a long, long way than not try.

Besides, I'm resilient. I've made it alive for 25 years, I think I can take a catastrophic failure from time to time.